Sunday, December 7, 2008


Sound the alarm---it's time for the friggin'
progress C
HRISKWANZUKKAH Rumor Patrol!?!?!

And Happy Holidays!
Below is an important progress CHRISKWANZUKKAH Rumor Patrol filled with invaluable information to help you bring in the season and to know what's what about what's up with what.

"But Joshua, what in the heck hole is CHRISKWANUKKAH?!?" You might ask.
Simple- it means that no matter what holiday you celebrate this season you get a free gift from Progress every time you come in the cafe' for the month of December.
Yippee skippee! Presents rule! It could be a free coffee, a dollar, 5 dollars, 10, 20, 50---up to $200 in Progress bux! Sweet!

So now it's time to get your favorite sweater, a warm lil' blanky, a hot cup of cider or cocoa or Progress Coffee, snuggle up and read away. And get an extra pair of wool socks, cause some of these rumors are gonna blow the ones you're wearing right off! (seriously)

Feliz Navidad!

  • Progress is now serving hot soup- TRUE
    Caramelized Onion Gorgonzola soup. Vegan Carrot Ginger Soup, Black Bean soup, and Hot & Sour soup.
  • The fam and I were cutting down a Christmas tree in Elgin and we saw the washed up lead singer of the band CREED- FALSE (True about the tree but the dude was just me)
  • Progress is in a Dell commercial- TRUE! click here to see it!
  • Lindsey Lohan was spotted wearing a progress posse shirt- FALSE
  • I gave a dude $500 for wearing a Cafe' de Progress t-shirt- TRUE!
  • The first 100 customers that come into Progress next Friday, 12/12, will receive a coffee in a sweet KEEN travel mug- FREE! - Double True!keen
  • Grandma got run over by a reindeer. -FALSE
  • Christopher Royal King, lead singer of the bodacious band This WIll Destroy You is showing his artistic creations at Progress before the end of this year! True and False- The band has no singer but Chris is in the band and he is showing his art at Progress. Awesome!
  • Ice Cube will be at Mohawk on the 14th of December. -TRUE DAT!!!
  • I am trying out for Austins next top model.- Double FALSE
  • Progress has lil' cute wrapped gift bags for you to give as presents chalk full of goodies.-TRUE! (ie- Prog t's, coffee, travel mugs, gift cards and oh so much more!)
  • The Smiths were going to do a Christmas reunion show at Red 7- (will have to call the Chief on this one)
  • The Progress Power Hour is where the Power Team comes back from the 80's and tears up telephone books and blows up hot water bottles in the cafe'!- FALSE- The Progress Power Hour is 1/2 OFF all espresso and coffee drinks every weekday from 3pm-4pm
  • Although Progress Coffee will make you Strong Like Paul Bunyan!- TRUE! Try it for yourself and get a Paul Bunyan t-shirt to tell the world how massively strong you are.

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